A Dallas newspaper, in a stunning journalistic coup, has discovered that his thirteen-year-old daughter does not agree with her father’s political views. I am shocked, shocked that Ted Cruz’s daughter has the audacity, the temerity to act like virtually every other normal healthy teenager in the free world. Heavens to Betsy and golly gee willikers! Obviously, The senator has no control over his own household and should resign his seat to get his house in order before this child exhibits further signs of being an individual human being!
For those of you who need help with the complicated task of tying your shoes, this is what is known as sarcasm.